In my last post I wrote about making a house a home, and while it gave a broad method to follow, it really isn’t the full picture. Haven making is an art (one that I think is an endangered species) and there are many layers to it. One of these layers is the art of the special touch.

I wanted to call it ‘touch points of pleasure’, but unfortunately none of these terms go where I want them to if I type them into a google. But I think you know what I mean – it’s those magical little things that take a space to the next level.

If we want to create a home, we mustn’t neglect the power of little touches. And yet, these are the things that are the first to be forgotten when life gets busy and chaotic – which these days is apparently all the time.

So why is the special little touch vital in nest making?

It’s the little touches that give you a sense of home. When they are personal items that tell the story of the people who live there and what they value, it gives a sense of place and grounding. If your space speaks to you and about you, it gives both you and visitors that welcome home feeling. It also gives you a little hit of pleasure as you move through your space. That reinforces the message that I belong here, I am cared for, and I am loved. And who knows that we need to hear those messages on a daily basis, especially when other parts of your life may not be quite so encouraging.

Personalising your home with things that speak to you is akin to having a dog. When dog owners talk about their pet giving them unconditional love and devotion, it’s a similar (if perhaps lower maintenance) welcome home. I guess that’s why I’ve always thought of my pot plants as pets. Essentially, the little touches are what make the difference between a space that is functional, and a space that is warm, loving and inviting.

To make your house a home, consider all of your senses and how they are being engaged. Sight, smell, touch, hearing, and taste all affect our sense of wellbeing. Candles, flowers, a breeze through a window, a nice smelling hand soap in the bathroom, a soft throw on the couch, woven baskets, the smell of coffee brewing – these are just a few ways we can create home.

No matter what your house is like, there are things you can do to make it speak love. For me, vases of foliage and the smell of baking have made a world of difference, no matter what our physical house is like.

We have a little practice in my home that we do when we are all feeling tired, cranky, and in need of a holiday. We bring out the table cloth and napkins, light a candle, and have the kids make place cards and set the table for dinner with the best dishes. These little things make everyone feel valued, united, and able to let their guard down.

There is one other thing that has to be considered if special touches are going to be effective, and that is balance. Often we can fall a bit too heavily in one direction. For some people, the balance tips a bit too far into cluttered.

Clutter often sneaks up on us over time as we add just one more thing that we picked up. But what this actually does is overload us with visual stimuli and creates a measurable sense of tension. Yet oddly enough, even when something bothers us, with time we tend to get used to the environment and stop actually seeing it. A quick furniture rearrange or a pair of fresh eyes can be really helpful in this case.

If you tend to have too many small things, try paring it down to a small collection of favourites that have something in common. There is nothing wrong with storing everything else and rotating what is on display every now and then.

The other extreme is minimalism to the point of sterility. Now if you love that aesthetic or want to make a design statement then be my guest, but for the most part people want to feel comfortable in a home. If you tend to be too minimal, try loosening things up by adding texture and softness such as natural fibres, tactile fabrics, and plants.

We all need a balance of rest and stimulation. Too little stimulation for all the senses can be as detrimental as too much. So, as you make home consider your senses, especially vision which is our primary sense as humans, and ask yourself if you have both opportunity for rest and stimulation in your space.

What special touches do you use to make your house a home? I’d love you to share some of your little bits of magic in the comments below.